The End of the Beginning
by Iron59
Summary: The fall of a nation and the fall of a once heroic man, now looking back at his past. The story of the 1st Victor through his life in the old Panem, through the Dark Days, and through the First Hunger Games, as his life falls apart.


_**Prologue: The End**  
_

* * *

Right here on my deathbed? Well. I might die within a few weeks - hell, any day now, but I don't see why not.

"So you're finally gonna tell me about your childhood, grandpa?"

Hey, look. I don't have much time here left, and you're all the family I have. Not my wife, your great-grandma, nor your grandparents, nor your parents, nor any relatives distant or close, to speak of. And all my friends have been dead even before your grandparents were born. Stay with me, I need all the companionship I'm left with right now. I'm not afraid of dying - I'm 93. I have lived through every single event in this godforsaken nation, and frankly, if I am to live longer - if ever there's a full-blown rebellion breaking throughout the whole country, I'll probably die in the ensuing war. Of course, only if this goddamn cancer doesn't get me within the next few weeks. Anyways, just stay with me. Please. And maybe I'll tell you my story.

"I'd still rather you'd not die, grandpa. We've been living in this house my whole life, and when you go...well, I'm only 14. I know it can't be helped, but...I really wish I wouldn't have to grow up so lonely. You're my only family, and I barely have friends in school. I know I am kind of a loner, but those few people close to me, I care about them so much. My girlfriend, my best friend, my buddies, you especially, I can't see myself being away from them."

Hey, it's still a good thing you have those you love. Yeah, you're kinda picky with the people you befriend, but still. Better a few deep relationships rather than a ton of shallow ones, yeah?

"Well, yeah,"

At least you still have friends. Your best friend, Victor? Great kid to be with, despite the fact that he isn't an actual victor. Your girlfriend Luna, she's pretty, and real intelligent. Heh, you should marry her. Your three other buddies, what's their names? Hercules, uh...that rich kid named Majesty, and...I forgot the last one...who's the other girl? Not your girlfriend, of course.

"Andromeda?"

Yeah, now I remember. My god, the parents of this generation pick the stupidest names.

"What does 'god' mean?"

You don't know what that means? God, so much things from my generation have been lost. The word god is a very ancient word, way before the 'apocalypse' that happened way before Panem even existed. You know what religion is, right?

"Some old belief in imaginary beings that would reward you if you do good and punish you if you do bad, and help you in bad times, that sort, as long as you do...uh...what's the word for that?"

Worship. God is a catch-all term for these imaginary beings.

"So you believe in that? They don't teach us anything at all about it at school, and neither do I know anyone who believes in such,"

I used to. I used to believe in things like going to a land of eternal happiness when you die a good person, or suffering eternal torturous punishment if you die an evil person. And that God cares for each and every person created upon this world of his creation. That he helps them in their time of need, begets the good of people with good, punishes the evil, and leads their way through their lives if they have faith in him.

"And what made you stop believing?"

...everything. Look, my wife is dead, my children and grandchildren are dead, my friends are dead. Other than you, my sole remaining great-grandchild, every single person I have ever loved or cared about is dead. I'm the only person from my generation I know, and I'm dying a slow death in a world that is completely different from my time. I am a forgotten relic of a time gone by, suffering liver cancer after trying to drink away the pain of my life too much. I've been through the Dark Days, where I lost all those whom I loved, and the Capitol has done nothing but rub its victory of that bygone war and the destruction of my life in my face. I have wasted 75 years of living knowing that the Capitol has destroyed me and everything I've ever stood for. And now I'm going to die destroyed. God never helped me in my time of need, never cared for those I love, and never did anything about all the evil of those who run this nation. Each and every person that starves to death, or gets executed, simply adds to one thing I believe: that there is nothing out there but this pitiful reality of life, where the only supreme being is a modern Babylon that gleefully feeds on the suffering of those who were unluckily born to be its slaves.

"Well, how exactly did all this happen, grandpa? I mean, how'd the Capitol do all this, to everyone and to you especially?"

Well, I guess I can start telling you about the Panem of my time. Maybe a background on it.

"I'm listening,"

Alright then. During my childhood Panem used to be a completely different place. Of course they teached you about how Panem rose from the ashes of a bygone civilization to form a new beginning, until the Dark Days occured and now the districts must be punished for their transgressions. A lot of stuff about the olden days are gone. Schools nowadays are nothing more than places for propaganda, indoctrination and misinformation so that the Capitol can mold and subjugate its citizens in any manner they please, and keep the people ignorant about the past and make them feel hopeless. Perhaps they teach more about Panem's real history at the Capitol, but if anything, they'd make sure the districts remain ignorant of their history.

"So what kind of country Panem was back then? Was it a lot richer?"

A bit. And infinitely more freer too. Hell, I studied in the Capitol until the rebellions started and I had to head back here to District 2. Anyways, this is what I remembered from my history classes back then. An unknown number of centuries ago, the world underwent a great chaotic period of chaos, war, and natural disaster, and the society of the ancients basically crumbled. This land was once an ancient civilization called America, but it became nothing more than a land of anarchy, of tons of tiny, unstable, impoverished countries and states warring for whatever resources left for a few centuries, with leftover technology from the ancients, and of a massive change in the world. Nations rose and fell with regularity. Plenty of history was lost. Populations decreased massively. Global temperatures increased, the coasts of America and most of the world was flooded, and perhaps the rest of the world has been mostly, or even completely gone. Panem may be the only country existing right now.

Anyways, about a hundred years before the Dark Days, from all the chaos of the post-apocalypse, Panem was formed, headed by a government that preached the ideals of things like communism and socialism and the like, some forms of government that'd be really hard to explain. They would create peace and order in the chaos that was America, and create a united nation between all the people in that time of disorder and disaster. Under them, the economy, how the government and society would function, and all the civic utilities and services provided, were all centrally controlled and managed by the Capitol. It soon led to the creation of the 13 districts, each with an industry that would help keep Panem afloat. Each person was to live frugally, and emphasize the needs of the whole community over selfish gain. Each person received adequate social welfare and services. Everyone would work towards the good of the community. Everything was for society and the country, and to make sure the human race actually survives and rises from all the disasters and chaos of the past. Of course, the opposite's true nowadays; the society emphasizes how the rich and powerful triumph over the starving poor.

I guess I could tell you about the districts back then. This was before the Dark Days, by the way. Actually, before what sparked the Dark Days happened. Anyways, in old Panem's heyday, the Capitol was smaller that it is today. Not significantly smaller, but still smaller. The people themselves, though still with a very high standard of living being the capital of the country, were completely different from the mindless, ignorant, uncaring, hedonistic rich of today. It used to be kind of an actually normal city back then, of course with plenty of government stuff, but yeah, normal as far as cities go. Back then people could go around the districts and the Capitol freely. Plenty of people from the districts would migrate there for work or education. The Capitol used to be a really nice city for everyone back then.

The districts were poorer, but far from the level of poverty nowadays. Of course, 1, 2, and 4 are still rich enough, but most of the rest used to be far better. And they were quite different, too.

District 1 wasn't luxury goods for the Capitol back then, it was more on producing general entertainment distributed to the whole nation. You could get everything there. Quality affordable food and plenty of restaurants for anyone. Movies and video games that nowadays only D1 and the Capitol get. Fashion for everyone. Plenty of music and arts. Resurrected versions of ancient sports. Anything and everything under the sun. Being a small district compared to the rest with only one big commercial city and a lot of land for industry, it used to be the other economic center of the country besides the Capitol. Today it's still is, luckily for them. Still have a good life compared to everyone else, only most of their product is taken away for the Capitol's gleeful consumption. Nowadays there's a big underground scene there that is all anti-establishment. Protest music, underground art, suggestive movies, the like, all to subtly show discontent against the Capitol's oppression and totalitarianism. Tons of people get arrested and abused for it. Or you can just protest in a rally and promptly get shot by Peacekeepers. Those who simply don't want to do anything about it prefer to stay loyal to the Capitol, be content with the wealth they're given, and view the Games as some honor to win. Imagine all the conflicts between the pro-Capitol and anti-Capitol people over there.

District 2 was a lot poorer. Not starving poor, but far from the richness of D1, and far from the good middle class life most of D2ers enjoy nowadays due to how so many people here join the military or the Peacekeepers and get good public services as a reward for it. It was kinda like District 12, without the starving people and huge poverty. Nothing but a spacious district littered with tiny mining villages for hundreds of miles around. Very rural. And of course, this was before we became the military center of the country.

District 3 used to be just as big as District 1, but less rich. Nowadays if you aren't a research worker, you slave away at the factories. It's way poorer now, and its the reason why people there value education so much. The district's central and only city was nothing but an absurdly enormous sprawl of research facilities, massive manufacturing factories for technological items in general, and a ton of prefabricated high-tech apartments for its populace. The Capitol may be richer, but D3 is way more full of technological stuff. It had everything. A ridiculously complex infrastructure and transit network. Intimidating technological universities with high standards. Plenty of public surveillance. The Internet before it got stuck to D3 and the Capitol only and got heavily censored. Nothing but tech, tech, and tech. And also a big minority of people from long-gone nations calling themselves Ayshans or Injans or stuff, who contributed a ton of stuff to D3's general advancement. Also, it's where new kinds of mutts get created. More on that next time.

District 4 back then was somewhat like District 2 now, standard-of-living-wise. Numerous fishing villages along hundreds of miles of coast. Lots of trade, plenty of rural people living a good life. It's a big district, so there'd be several cities around. Those in the cities had it even better, with all the money that inter and intra-district shipping and trade entailed. Nowadays slightly less money to be had, and if you're not from the city, you're probably poor. But with all the career tributes in the cities, those people don't have to worry about the Games much. Also, they used to speak a different language there. I don't remember what it was called. Espanish. Mexspeak. Mexian. Fourian. It was spoken by some weird dark-skinned southern people from the flooded lands. The Spanics? Hispics? Hispians? Spanians? Mexes? Don't really remember. One of my closest friends back then was from 4. I could still remember all the profanities he'd be spewing pretty much all the time. "Poonietta". "Iho deh poota madrey". "Besow me culow". "Cabrone". "Cheenga too ermanah". And my favorites, "Hodeh too madrey ayr nocheh" and "Yow cagoh in la lechey deh too poota madrey". Hah. 93 years on this goddamn earth and the war still feels like yesterday. I miss my friends.

District 5 was kind of a big district. Life was a lot like that in District 3, same moderate income, but less technology and more power plants all over the place. That place is nothing but wind farms, dams, coal plants, solar plants and generators and all sorts of power generating stuff centered in numerous small cities. Seriously, everything there generated electricity. All the houses and apartments ran on solar energy, and even all the vehicles they get from District 6. Anyways, nowadays in 5 if you're not working as some boss in any of the plants or any position that gives you power in overseeing your plant or wherever you work, you're probably some underpaid, overworked worker struggling to make ends meet. Not as poor as the rest of the districts nowadays, considering the workforce needs to be really skilled with handling power, but far from being rich either.

District 6 was kinda richer. Back then, that is. All the vehicles under the sun were, and still are, made there. Every car, every tank, every plane, every train, maybe some boats, and every kind of transport you can think of, it's made there. Back then money was really flowing between the cities there. A massive automotive industry bringing in a load of $$$ and plenty of factories for all your transport needs, be it any kind of plane, train, or whatever military vehicle Panem needs. Racing used to be a really big sport there, but I don't think it's allowed anymore, just so the people would focus on the Hunger Games and not have an outlet of entertainment to forget about the pain of oppression. Nowadays they slave away in factories for low pay and poor living conditions.

District 7 was as poor as D2 back then. And it was holy-Mother-of-God big, empty and cold. Way up in the north. Nothing but snow, timber, and a scattered rural population. For the sheer size of the place they only had one major city, and it was mostly just a bunch of apartments and residential areas around wood-working factories and warehouses. The rest of the tiny-as-hell population lived in tiny villages hundreds of miles from each other, with only bullet trains from D6 connecting them. Nowadays I bet it's even poorer than back then. Although with the sheer size of the place, I bet it'd be harder for the Peacekeepers to completely restrain everyone.

District 8 was a small and absolutely shitty district. Especially their only city. My god, the pollution of that place can make a rat sick. Overpopulated, poor, full of trash, and unbreathable air. Probably the worst district to live in back then. I could not understand how despite all the decades of Panem's growth, District 8 still felt like a remnant of the old dilapidated countries from the pre-Panem era. Crime. Corruption. Godawfully polluted factories spilling so much waste and choking the environment. Being the easternmost big city, it was probably way harder to govern. Towards the end of the old Panem, it was getting somewhat better, since...well, efforts improve the standard of living there, I guess. Less crime, better government, more cleanliness policies, that sort. But now it's back to shit, and it's probably way poorer and deader than back then.

There is absolutely nothing interesting in Districts 9 to 11. Not back then, and not now either. Thousands of miles of wilderness. No cities. Gigantic farms. Livestock. Grain. Farmers' towns. Fields of wheat and whatever. Yearly harvests. Weird farm traditions and culture. The weirdest goddamn accent ever, more ridiculous than the Capitol's. It sounded like "Awt thayre in them farm districkts, there ain't nothin' there, ah tell ya. Nope, nothin' interestin' at all. Unless y'all think ya'd fancy the good ol' farm life and be fixin' ta get awt thayre in the fields and do hard work 'til the sun sets. Ya think you'd fancy that?". Anyways, accent aside, over at D11, most citizens there are actually an ethnicity called the blacks. It's the reason why more often than not D11 tributes are dark skinned. And their accent is even weirder. Hell, in some areas the accent is so thick I wouldn't be surprised if it isn't a whole new language altogether. From what I remember not all of them spoke like that, but in some parts, you might as well be in a different country. Anyways, the people from these districts were kind of poor, but at least they plenty of food to feed their families. Now the Capitol just steals everything and leave the people of these districts starved and malnourished despite the fact that it's where the country's food comes from. District 12 was the same as it is today. Absurdly far from the Capitol. Tiny, remote, and very rural. Panem barely governed the place back then, and they still barely govern the place nowadays. Other than coal mines and a single town where everyone lives in, there's pretty much nothing there but mines, wilderness, and a somewhat poor populace. Nowadays it's probably the poorest of the districts, with most of the populace slaving away in dangerous conditions at the mines, with miniscule pay and the risk of death by mine explosions.

District 13 used to be the military center of Panem. A tiny district with a large city full of factories, for weapons manufacturing and whatnot, and graphite mines in the countryside. Most importantly, they made nuclear power and was the only place in the country apart from the Capitol that had nuclear weapons. They were the most powerful district among the 13, with only the Capitol rivaling it. This was a very important point. It...what time is it?

"9 o'clock, gramps."

I really don't think I have the energy and time to explain all my experiences in the Dark Days today. I'm tired. Cancer saps your energy so much. I know you, you sleep any damn time you want, and I can't do a thing about it. But...well, I am 93. There's no more vitality in this old body. Much less with a terminal disease. Can you call the nurse now?

"Sure thing, grandpa. I'll be back."

...

...

...

...

...

...

"Here she is, grandpa. Hey, Ivy, take care of him, alright?"

"As always. Mr. Ender, it's time to rest now,"

Look at me. I can't go to sleep without a nurse by my side, lest something happen to me during the night, or if I feel restless from the pain, or if I need to take my meds. When I was young I never imagined that this would be the way I finally leave this earth and go to restful nonexistence. Thought I'd just get executed or die in battle. Sigh. I miss my childhood. Sometimes I wished I had died in it. I miss the old Panem.

I think I still remember the anthem of the olden times. It was a song of the ancients, I believe. something to reunite and instill hope in a divided and hopeless people. Of course, with alterations to fit into the context of Panem. First sung at the raising of the red flag at the founding of the Capitol. Let me sing it.

*ahem*

_O say, can you see by that dawn's early light,_  
_What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?_  
_Whose red glory flies high, past that ancient night,_  
_That end of all chaos and the end of suffering?_  
_O'er the ancient ruins of an old bygone might_  
_Arises a new nation for a new beginning _  
_And the banner of Panem waves in liberty _  
_O'er the land of plenty and the home of the free_

_O thus be it ever, when new men shall stand,_  
_Between their loved home and the world's desolation,_  
_May Panem be blessed, may each man work hand in hand,_  
_That our every action makes a prosperous nation _  
_From the mountains and seas of our great fatherland,_  
_Let this land shine in glory across all of creation _  
_As the banner of Panem flies triumphantly _  
_O'er the land of plenty and the home of the free!_

...

"For an old man, you still have a good voice, Mr. Ender."

"That was the anthem back then, grandpa? Wow. That song, seriously, it's...knowing what Panem was back then? It's a really heartfelt song."

I know, right? But what about Panem now? Our anthem is a soulless and lyricless dirge. The banner of Panem waves in oppression and not liberty. This land is not a land of plenty, and nor is it the home of the free. Far from it. And I'm going to die in this forsaken land, with nothing but nightmares of the past and sorrow for everyone whom I ever loved.

"..."

...

You're going to sleep now?

"Nah, not sleepy yet. Besides, it's a Friday. Nothing to do tomorrow. Maybe I'll do some homework in advance so I could just relax for the weekend, and maybe I'll read something in my room. I dunno."

Ah, alright then. I'll see you tomorrow, and maybe I'll tell you about my life back in the Dark Days. I have all the time in the world, but not the energy though. Heh.

"Good night, then?"

Yeah, good night, don't be scared of the dark, and don't let the monsters get you. Ha.

"Grandpa, I'm 14."

Won't you let an old man relive the past, Sol? Remember all the times I spent raising you, my only remaining family member, despite the fact that I was already in my 80s and in poor health? After your parents were gone? And before this cancer struck me? Come on, I'm a storied man, and part of my stories was all the hijinks of raising a kid like you at this old age. I've plenty of stories, son. Plenty of them. Plenty to relive, plenty to remember, and plenty to forget, or want to forget.

"And I'm...well, I don't suppose a 14-year old boy from District 2 has much stories to tell. Or to come back to."

Ah, you'll earn your experiences. And hopefully it isn't some tragic epic tale of sadness like I fancy myself to have.

You know what, I just got an idea.

"What?"

I have a tale to tell. Let's make a book.

"W-what? Can we even finish a book when you're in this state? You'll probably die far before we're done."

You write it. I'll just tell the details, the plot, and everything. After I die you can go ahead and edit it until it's complete. Now getting it published is kind of a question, but maybe with news of rebellions in District 8 and some other areas right now, I dunno. Maybe when you finish this book, Panem would be free once more. Whether it happens this year or the next decade, as long as it comes. I can already picture it, a story of life throughout the Dark Ages and the First Hunger Games through the eyes of a lost District 2 boy.

"Got any title thought of?"

Hmm. Maybe "The Life and Times of Tristan Ender", subtitled "A Biography of the First Victor".

"Hmm, I think we can come up with something better."

Ah, I dunno yet. "Days of Darkness: Through the Dark Days and the Games". Good enough?

"Ehhhhhh, you know what, let's just think this through tomorrow,"

Good idea. Good night, Sol.

"Good night, grandpa."

...

Hey, Ivy, can you turn off the lamp, please? Or at least dim it.

"Sure, Mr. Ender. Anything to help you rest easy."

...

Thank you so much. Ah, that's better. Good night.

* * *

_Reviews, error corrections, and critique appreciated. I guess watching Catching Fire made me want to write again._


End file.
